


Dysfunctional Family

by CrystalNavy



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: F/M, Self-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-14 01:21:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19263109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrystalNavy/pseuds/CrystalNavy
Summary: Lise was dumped into Tolkien World by a guy with a weird sense of humor. She was adopted by Feanor. Or rather, she adopted him.





	1. Dad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feanor is Lise's Dad, and she will fight anyone who says otherwise, including Feanor himself.

The house was nice, for the time frame Lise was in. She had a nice bed to sleep in, and enough food to survive. Not to mention she finally had brothers she had always wanted. The only thing she missed was her technology. Well, maybe she could ask her new dad to replicate her technology for her.

He was good at that stuff, after all. Lise adored his latest invention.

"Are you playing with my Palantiri again, Lise?" Feanor said in exasperation "They are not toys, you know."

After living with her for a month, Feanor had gotten used to Lise's antics, more or less. Lise, who was viewing a particularly scenic location, pouted at him.

"But it doesn't hurt anyone, Dad." she pointed out

"I am not your Dad." Feanor said "You just showed up out of nowhere and claimed me as one!"

Lise responded by leaping at him, knocking him to the floor.

"You might as well give up, Dad." Lise smiled "You're my Dad and nothing would change that."


	2. Melkor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lise, having read the source book, doesn't like Melkor, or his influence on her Dad. Fortunately, she is suprisingly genre-savvy, and she seeks to drive the interloper away.

Melkor came to talk with Feanor quite often. His visits became more frequent after Feanor made the Silmarils. But Lise had a secret of her own. She held knowledge, and knowledge was power. And a plan began to form in her head. Feanor came to her, asking her to cook dinner. It was sensible enough, since Lise was the only girl in the house since Mum left.

First step.

"Hey, Celegorm, can you show me where you keep.....animal excrement?" Lise suddenly asked

"What do you need that for?" Celegorm gave Lise an alarmed look

"The reasons are my own." Lise smiled sweetly at her brother "I am good at sewing, and if you show me, I can make you a new onesie."

"It's a deal." Celegorm said solemnly, and they shook hands "Follow me."

Second step.

That night, Lise brought her homemade dinner to the whole family plus Melkor. Feanor and Melkor were whispering to one another. She clearly wasn't meant to know what they were talking about, and neither were her brothers. Well, joke was on them. She already knew, and she was going to make Melkor rue the day he decided to mess with her family.

"This food is disgusting?" Melkor spat his food out

Lise put a generous helping of animal dung, which Celegorm had helped her obtain, into Melkor's portion of food. Feanor and his sons all got dung-free meals, as did Lise herself.

"What are you talking about?" Feanor raised an eyebrow "It's delicious."

All seven of his sons agreed.

"Something must be wrong with you." Melkor pointed an accusing finger at Feanor 

"I think that something is wrong with you, actually." Lise deadpanned "You've insulted my cooking. I won't forgive you for that."

"What can you possibly do to me?" Melkor seemed amused

"Sick him, boy." Lise smirked

Huan leapt upon Melkor, pinning him in place and snarling.

-x-

"Look, I am sorry I was mean to you earlier. I misread your intentions. I'll show you where father keeps his Silmarils as an apology."

Melkor was unable to hide his desire, and Lise snickered on the inside. He took the bait all right.

"Follow me." she said

And he did. She took him to the vault. She inserted the key she had stolen from Feanor into the lock and let Melkor inside. He took the closed chest and opened it.

"What are you doing, you thief?" 

Melkor and Lise turned around. Feanor and Maglor were standing there, with furious scowls on their faces.

Success.

"Your friendship offer was a lie?" Feanor exploded "You were after my Silmarils this whole time!"

Then, the 'Silmarils' exploded.

"Touch-sensitive grenades." Lise smiled evilly "Maglor and I replaced the real Silmarils with them just today."


	3. Exiled

The rumors spread fast, and Lise's Dad was summoned. Apparently, something bad had happened. Lise pretended that she didn't have a clue, and journeyed with her father and brothers. There, in the far north, they built a fortress they could call their own, and her Dad named it Formenos.

They had been living there for a week, and even Grandfather came to stay with them for the foreseeable future. The inhabitants of this new city lived in recluse for the most part, and even Lise had to admit it was pretty boring. 

Dad brought the Silmarils along, and locked them up in the safe behind thick, iron doors. He was absent most of the time, working by his lonesome. While he was occupied elsewhere, Lise took an opportunity to play with his Palantiri again. 

And then, an even more devious thought crossed her mind. Having read the book, she knew that Melkor would show up and try to 'befriend' her Dad, in order to manipulate him and get his hands on Silmarils.

-x-

"I think we should go along with this, Dad." Lise insisted "He offers us freedom, and it'd be a waste not to accept his proposal. I mean, what could possibly happen?"

Melkor, for his part, tried to hide the enthusiasm he felt upon realizing that someone was actually taking his side.

Lise smiled internally. She had Melkor right where she wanted him.


End file.
